Gawk no longer, Fudgington-philes! I, the prolific professor, have created a new molecular marvel to absolutely astound even the most nefarious naysayer.
The idea came to me on one of the many bone rattling, chill-ifying nights spent locked up in a cage of inconvenience in Norway's Phantom Fjords. Many a hardship befell my companions and myself those many odd months spent in involuntary exile and now, returning to Von Fudgington Manor and Industries, I have taken to my laboratories to create a new scientific wonder to cure many of man's ills!
This brand new, Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™ is capable of an extraordinary amount of different and various astounding applications.
Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™, when taken orally, at least 8 (eight) times a day promotes health, wealth and longevity. In fact, it can be said that Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™ is absolutely essential to sustaining a lively lifestyle.
Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™, when combined with Fudgington brand Soapy Suds™, creates a powerful cleaning agent which can be used to sanitize most household surfaces.
Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™, when exposed to temperatures below zero degrees centigrade, hardens into a crystalline structure which can be employed for a myriad of uses including (but not limited to): chilling spirits and liquors, winter-type sporting activities, and longterm food preservation.
Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™, when exposed to temperatures above one-hundred degrees centigrade, vaporizes into a gaseous cloud that can be used for cooking vegetables and propelling all manner of horseless locomotion.
Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™ can snuff out fires.
Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™ is a wonderful habitat for all manner fish, marine mammals, and various other aquatic-type flora and fauna.
Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™ when placed inside a rubber balloon makes for hours of fun for the kiddies.
Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™ promotes a green and hearty lawn and garden.
Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™ has an almost limitless number of applications yet unknown. So, in an act of generosity to mankind, I hereby publish my notes on the proper procedure to produce Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™: Using a Fudgington brand Molecular Combinator™, bond two (2) atoms of "H" hydrogen (atomic # 1) with one (1) atom of "O" oxygen (atomic # 8) in a roughly triangular configuration. Repeat thusly until the desired amount of Fudgington brand Super Sensational Syrup™ is accumulated. (Confused, my little geniuses-in-training? Simply highlight the above blank space to reveal the formula, but first, ensure there are no ragamuffins or roustabouts peaking over your shoulder!)
Keep reaching for the stars,
C.V.F.
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